Life.

October 24th, 2011

Freedom

Posted by julieengel in Uncategorized

From the moment of conception

To the final expiration day

We fight for each ticking second

Before our lives are stolen away

 

Something lurks just around the bend

Waiting and watching intently

Before it steals life in the end

And souls float away gently

 

From the moment of death

We become eternal creatures

Free of worry and stress

With strong and fearless features

 

From the moment we perish

Our souls are set on fire

Every moment is cherished

An eternity so inspired

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4 Responses to ' Freedom '

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  1.    billyfrawley said,

    on October 25th, 2011 at 10:53 pm

    I like how the poem explains life as a constant fight and how death is always imminent. You explain death as a peaceful, desired end, which is interesting. Cool poem.

  2.    jenny abeles said,

    on October 25th, 2011 at 11:39 pm

    There’s a soft, meditative tone here, Julie, and the theme of “freedom” resonates in a blog given to political topics. I like the way you try to imagine the peace that death brings, but I’d be curious to see, too, what turmoil it liberates us from. What is the frantic hurly-burly of life that you are particularly longing to be free from lately? You know so much more about life than death, really–why not describe that?

    I like the image of souls floating gently away…

  3.    jnathan1 said,

    on October 26th, 2011 at 3:44 am

    Julie, I have to admit I was pretty skeptical when I read that your blog would be about war and politics. I’m really not great at following politics- to be honest that stuff really bores me- but you made me forget I was reading anything remotely political. The narrative of the soldier was so well done! You did a great job of putting me in someone else’s shoes and I felt like I was right there beside the soldier, in the sweltering heat. Did you do a lot of research? I’m only asking because it felt so authentic, with the dialogue, stories and especially the pictures.
    The post “we are the .99%”might be favorite. I liked the infusion of current events into the storyline. It would be interesting to hear a soldier’s opinion of the whole thing. Do you know anyone in the army now? It hit kind of close to home for me because I know people going into the Israeli army this year. I kept thinking about how they would view these issues as soldiers.
    The poem. I had a hard time with it also. I liked the balance of the melancholy tone, and the whimsical rhyme scheme. Also the way it kind of went from wistful to joyous to a little sad to happy and then wistful again. A rollercoaster ride of emotions all in one poem, well done.
    Second poem: back to the Julie I knew from the first few blogs. The first poem I think was a stretch for everyone, but in the second you reminded me why you were doing the blog again. I felt like it summed up the previous posts perfectly. Is it from somewhere? Your own writing? Anyway, I loved it. Great job, julie

  4.    julieengel said,

    on October 31st, 2011 at 1:41 am

    I wasn’t too sure what to write about when I started, and even after I thought I was doing my entire blog all wrong. But your critique makes me feel like I didn’t completely fail, so thank you! When I first chose to write about politics , war, and all the other fun stuff in between, I felt that most people would be disinterested. You said that you find that kind of stuff boring, which many people do. I figured this much, so I really tried to write my first blog through the eyes of a solider so people would feel something and become interested. Politics, war, and all that jazz are always controversial topics that people tend to shy away from as both readers and writers these days. I’m very into politics, war, history, and conspiracies, so in terms of doing research, I’d say I based my work off of endless amounts of information I’ve absorbed over time. I’ve read many books and journals about war, mostly WW2, so they definitely helped me in writing a realistic-type journal. As far as the 99% post, I’m so happy that was your favorite post because it was by far my favorite piece I’ve done thus far. I felt like it was important to throw some current political events in there. One of my friends is in the army, and he actually supports the movement. I can’t say all enlisted people would support it, but a lot of them do. Check out #Occupy Marines on twitter, fb, tumblr, or just research it. There are marines occupying cities along with protesters, to make sure the peaceful protesters are kept safe. (There’s been a great deal of police brutality.) I wish I could’ve written an essay on the occupy movement just because peopple are so misinformed about the whole thing, and about what’s actually going on in this country. Anyhow, I really appreciate the critique about my poetry. You say you had a time with it also, but you didn’t say you had a hard time with anything before that. And later you say that the first poem was a stretch but you also say it’s well done. So, I’m honestly just a bit confused as to whether you thought it was good or awful. If there’s anything you think I should/shouldn’t do, please don’t hesitate to tell me. I could use the critique so I know how to improve. Anyway, I personally felt lost writing the love poem and felt I did a terrible job. It wasn’t supposed to be a rollercoaster ride of emotions. It was supposed to be about two people reigniting the flame, if you will. It was an awful attempt and reading it back makes me wish I could delete it. No idea where it came from or what I was thinking when I wrote it. Horrible, horrible, horrible. But I’m happy you liked my second poem, I actually tried really hard to write it as well as I could. You make me feel like I should stick to my theme of war/politics for the rest of the semester, which I think I will. The last poem was from the heart. I feel like my view on life and death is very different from other people, so I tried to express my view in the poem. Glad you liked it. Thank you for your critique, it definitely helped!

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